Being a Calm Wife in Difficult Times

When the COVID-19 pandemic  caused many husbands to lose their jobs, wives had to be extra frugal so they could maintain the family’s financial stability. Never mind trying trendy recipes and showing them off on social media accounts, they were already very grateful just to be able to eat simple meals every day. Not a day passed without anxiety: when would the pandemic end and life return to normal?

As savings begin to run low and the financial situation does not improve, the atmosphere at home can become boring, even tense. How can you be a wife who remains calm in times like these?

1. Count Your Blessings

Almost everyone feels the negative impact of the pandemic coronavirus on their family finances. What differs is the level of difficulty, according to each person’s financial endurance. Some can still keep food supplies stocked. Some can only afford to buy food for one day at a time. Others are even threatened by hunger and depend on help from other people.

When the family’s financial situation becomes increasingly difficult, a person’s feelings can become more sensitive. For example, you may often find protests on social media: “Don’t post about food. Respect the feelings of those who are struggling to get food.” On the other hand, people creating dishes in the kitchen and proudly showing the results may simply be trying to cope with boredom or stress during the PSBB (Large-Scale Social Restrictions) period.

The choice is in our hands. Will we become overly sensitive or remain calm and trust in God’s care? The heart determines perspective: do we see posts like that as showing off or as inspiration? 

If you feel disturbed, immediately turn your thoughts to other things. Do not focus on what you do not have right now. Be thankful that there are still people who can cook in the middle of the pandemic, because that means the world is not yet too dark.

Be assured that each person has blessings of their own. You too have received your own blessings from God. You still have a husband, children, a place to live, and you can still eat even if it is simple—all of these are priceless blessings. Remember, there are still many people who are hungry and have no shelter in the midst of the world’s difficult conditions right now.

By counting and giving thanks for the blessings you have, you will not be easily jealous or disturbed by other people’s blessings. 

A tranquil heart gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones. – Proverbs 14:30

2. Find and Make the Most of Opportunities

There is no need to be discouraged when you see that other people’s financial condition is better. In fact, this is precisely the time when you can learn to be a good helper to your husband. You can offer creative ideas or exchange thoughts with other married couples about what can be done to improve the family economy in these difficult times.

Try looking around and finding opportunities. Do what you can do to survive in the midst of hardship. Keeping yourself busy with productive things can increase income and also challenge you to improve your skills. This is far better than merely complaining, doing nothing, and sinking into self-pity.

When other people display their work on social media for self-expression, you can use it to sell online. Restrictions on activities outside the home have made people prefer shopping online, so selling on social media is one of the right choices.

If you are talented in cooking, try offering your signature menu with a Pre Order (PO) system. With a PO system, the risk of loss is very small because you only cook according to orders. Your husband can help deliver the orders while still following health protocols. With good food and good service, many people may place repeat orders.

It is not impossible that this hobby could become extra income even after the pandemic is over. This is far more beneficial than being busy reading news about the coronavirus or constantly checking social media accounts. God has given us understanding to find opportunities and use them well.

3. Cultivate Beauty from Within

Physical beauty is indeed important, but it is only temporary. Inner beauty, this is the strongest weapon for living life. A wife who has a grateful heart, is calm, and does not badger her husband with complaints and nagging when hardship strikes—that is true beauty.  

Be grateful for the blessings God gives through your husband’s hard work, whatever the amount may be. Ask for wisdom so that you can manage those blessings wisely. Gratitude will lighten the burden and brighten the heart.

A joyful heart makes the face cheerful, but heartache crushes the spirit. – Proverbs 15:13

Remember how many hardships you have successfully come through with God. Simply believe that this challenge too will pass. Take heart and face tomorrow with optimism. 

She is clothed with strength and dignity; she laughs at the days to come. – Proverbs 31:25

A peaceful wife will calm the whole household, and the opposite is also true. A husband as the head of the family is usually the one who feels the most restless at times like this. However, through the calm radiated by his wife, a husband can think clearly and look for solutions for a better life.  

When life is hard, do not add to the burden by creating new troubles. It is better to use this opportunity to cultivate your inner beauty. Be a calm wife because of gratitude and trust in God, and sincerity in living life.

In the midst of difficult global conditions because of the pandemic, you can choose to pity yourself or instead train yourself to become a calm and wise wife. Even though life does not unfold as hoped, keep counting God’s blessings, find and make use of the opportunities that exist, and let your inner beauty shine. Surely your days will feel lighter and more pleasant to live through. God bless you and your family.

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