Want Freedom from Pornography? Try These 4 Steps!

I was introduced to pornography at age 13. The first time I accessed a pornographic film, I felt deeply satisfied. For years, I hid this habit and no one knew about it. As a teenager still ruled by surging hormones, I diligently chased that false pleasure without caring what effect it had on me.

Indeed, the pleasure I got from it was extraordinary, but it was never enough. I always wanted more and more. As a result, I felt ashamed not only of myself, but also around other people, especially the opposite sex.

Now, by God's help, I have been set free from pornography. Still, I will not forget how deeply this sin of sexual immorality once damaged me.

Has something similar happened to you? Are you trying to get out of pornography addiction that keeps causing you to fall into the same sin again and again? How can you be free from this?

The Danger of Pornography

In today’s information age, sexually charged content is very easy for anyone to access. Data shows that 50% of children ages 11-13 in England have already watched pornography. In Indonesia itself, there are an average of 25 thousand internet activities related to child pornography every day, a deeply alarming number.

So why is pornography so alluring? According to research, watching pornographic films can trigger the release of the hormone dopamine (producing pleasurable, satisfying, or intoxicating sensations), along with a feeling of relaxation (similar to the effects of opium). As a result, the brain is trained to recognize pleasure from pornography, so viewers will always need more and more.

This is why pornography, which is the sin of sexual immorality, is so hard to avoid and let go of. Even so, pornography carries long-term dangers. Based on 2019 research by the British Board of Film Classification (BBFC), watching pornography can reduce respect for the opposite sex. In addition, addiction to pornographic films also leads to damaged relationships, divorce, and even job loss. Terrifying, isn’t it?

At a glance, a life of enjoying pornography may look pleasurable. But if you look more deeply, there are so many risks it brings, such as mental health problems, mood, emotional issues, impaired memory and brain function, even depression and problems in relationships.

Pornography and False Intimacy

Even though people know its dangers, why is pornography still so sought after? What does it offer that makes people want it so badly?

The answer is: intimacy. More than merely being social creatures, I believe God created us to be close to one another, especially in the relationship between men and women. Genesis 2:18 says, The LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”

In other words, there is a strong connection that happens when one person becomes deeply intimate with another.

However, the need for intimacy is not a reason for us to look at or do pornographic things. God created intimacy for those who have bound themselves in the covenant of marriage. When this is misused and practiced by people who are not ready, instead of becoming a blessing, intimacy becomes a curse.

Imagine if your five-year-old child asked you to buy them a car. Of course you would not give it, because you know it would endanger their safety. It is the same with intimacy, which is reserved for those who are ready to build commitment with their partner until death parts them.

The reality is that many people want to enjoy that intimacy instantly, without rejection, without risk, and without the bond of marriage. As you get older, unmet needs for intimacy can lead you into feelings of frustration.

This is where pornography becomes so tempting: it offers false intimacy according to the viewer’s fantasies. It is thrilling, astonishing, with no risk of rejection at all. Sadly, all of it is false pleasure that traps you in a vicious cycle, where you keep chasing what is newer and more exciting, without end.

How Can I Be Free?

Pornography addiction makes it hard for us to see the opposite sex as human beings made in the image and likeness of God, rather than as sexual objects. Pornography can also steal our focus from God, even becoming another god that causes us to lose salvation.

In short, pornography is nothing more than the devil’s deception. The devil always tries to lie to you by promising pleasure if you follow him. But in the end, you become the victim of that lie.

If you are reading this and realizing that you are addicted to pornography, you may be wondering: can I be free? There is good news for you: Yes, you can! It is not easy, but as long as you are willing to believe and take action, you can begin today.

Start with these simple steps:

1. Realize God’s Plan for Your Life

Do you believe that God created you with great dignity?

So God created mankind in His image, in the image of God He created them; male and female He created them. – Genesis 1:27

Yes, God created you and me in His image. Amazing! Now, if you realize how extraordinary you are, would you allow yourself to be defiled, even a little?

This is one important point you need to reflect on. God longs for you to have a holy life. In 1 Thessalonians 4:7 it is written, “For God did not call us to be unclean, but to be holy.” Because this is God’s command, it means this is something possible to do, not something impossible.

Let God’s plan for your life become a conviction. Holiness is the blueprint that God has set for your life, not uncleanness or sexual immorality.

2. Identify Which Areas Make You Fall

After saying yes to God’s plan, the next step is to identify which areas often cause you to fall into sin. “The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak,” as it is written in Matthew 26:41. As long as you are still in this physical body, that is how long you must keep fighting to overcome the flesh.

Take time to map out your weak points. What things often cause you to fall? Maybe when you have nothing to do, when you are home alone, or when you stay up too late so your mind easily wanders. Or when you watch films that include suggestive or arousing scenes. Personally, I fall easily if I have not had my devotional time that day.

Wherever your weak point is, take firm steps to avoid shows or anything else that leads you toward lustful thoughts.

Build a close relationship with God through devotional time and prayer. Ask someone else, for example your mentor, to help you out of this struggle. When you begin to feel temptation, redirect your thoughts by keeping yourself busy. For example, sweeping, cooking, or calling family members or people who can help you.

3. Cut Off Access to Pornography

Now it is time for you to take the most drastic step. It is not enough merely to direct or divert your thoughts; you also need to make sure you do not fall again into the same sin. How?

Remember Romans 6:12: Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its desires. In other words, you must distance yourself from anything that can invite that sin back again.

What easily tempts you? Magazines? Films? Games? Books? Whatever it is, throw it far away so that you are no longer tempted to access pornographic content.

What about your internet access and devices? It may be too hard for you to cut off your internet connection or sell your computer / phone. However, you can stop accessing tempting content. For example, unfollow certain accounts on Instagram, stop subscribing to (unsubscribe from) YouTube content, and block contacts or leave groups that always share pornographic videos.

Just as importantly, find a friend or spiritual mentor who can be your partner in fighting this sin.

Whatever it takes, close every access point or opportunity to view pornography. Do not forget that you need God’s help, as written in James 4:7, “Therefore submit yourselves to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you!”

4. Find a Community or Spiritual Mentor

As a continuation of step number three, you need help to keep living in holiness. God did not create you to live alone, especially in your spiritual life. Having the right community and spiritual mentor can inspire you to live a holy life, and also help you get back up if you fall.

Galatians 6:2 declares: “Carry one another’s burdens. In this way you fulfill the law of Christ.” This is the benefit of having the right community, where you can share your burdens or difficulties with others. Besides that, you can also learn how to keep living in God’s way.

If you long to find a spiritual community, you can contact the WhatsApp number 0821 2285 8686. Or, if you want to learn more about God and His Word, click here to register.

Freedom Is in Your Hands

The good news is that breaking free from the snare of pornography is very possible. It all comes back to your decision. Do not delay any longer, take your first step today to live a holy life that pleases God. Embrace a new life, and receive all the promises and blessings God has prepared for those of us who are willing to live according to His will. Amen!

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References:

enough.org/stats-youth-and-porn www.desiringgod.org/articles/pornography-the-new-narcotic grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/steps-to-help-quit-porn/ www.escapingthe.com/post/authentic-intimacy tirto.id/tiap-hari-ada-25-ribu-aktivitas-pornografi-anak-di-indonesia-cmQP www.psychguides.com/behavioral-disorders/porn-addiction/ www.therecoveryvillage.com/process-addiction/porn-addiction/related/pornography-statistics/ www.addictioncenter.com/community/signs-of-porn-addiction/ www.psycom.net/porn-addiction

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