How to Avoid the Trap of Loneliness While Waiting for a Spouse

Are you struggling with loneliness? Do you feel alone, forgotten, and miserable because you do not yet have a partner?

In truth, at some point in life, we can all experience loneliness. For example, when moving to a new home or workplace, losing someone we love, or having to live alone, far from family. Even in the middle of a crowd, loneliness can suddenly come over us.

Sadly, loneliness tends to become a stigma for singles or those who do not yet have a partner. Even though loneliness can affect anyone in certain situations. Married couples or people who have already been blessed with children can also feel lonely.

So then, how can you be a single who does not get trapped in loneliness during this season of waiting?

Loneliness Is Only a Feeling, Not Reality

Even though I walk through the valley of darkness, I will fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me. – Psalm 23:4 

When you feel alone, remember that it is only your feeling, not a fact. The fact is, God is always with you, 24 hours a day, in joy and in sorrow. He never leaves you for even a second! The psalmist says that in darkness, even when danger is lurking, God is always with him.

Constantly dwelling on and indulging your loneliness will trap you in pain. In the end, you will only pity yourself.

Do not believe the lie that you are pitiful and lonely. The truth is that you are never alone, because God never leaves you by yourself. He is always with you in every situation.

And do not believe that you are unworthy of love because you are unattractive. The truth is, you are loved so greatly by Jesus, that He was willing to sacrifice His life on the cross for you!

Find True Friends

There are friends who bring ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. – Proverbs 18:24

Do not let your desire to avoid loneliness in life make your thoughts focus only on finding a partner. As a result, you may choose friends carelessly. Be careful in friendship, because there are friends who bring harm. People like this may cast you aside after getting what they want from you.

The desire to get married quickly can make someone careless in choosing a potential spouse. Surely you do not want to discover later that your partner actually has bad character.

Look for true friends, namely those who want the best for you. Friends who accept you as you are, while continuing to encourage you to become a better person. Friends who always direct you to what is right, what God desires from you. Friends who do not seek personal gain, but sincerely love you.

Find true friends in a community that builds you up, that teaches true values according to the word of God. 

Rejoice in the Lord

Delight yourself in the LORD, and He will give you what your heart desires. Commit your life to the LORD and trust in Him, and He will act. – Psalm 37:4-5  

Avoid placing your happiness on whether or not you have a partner in life. You have many reasons to keep rejoicing, no matter what your status or situation is. Our sense of safety or security must come from God, not from what we have or what people think about us.

Sometimes we can feel lonely because perhaps we have not yet received what we think is a "gift from God," such as a spouse, children, and so on. But have we ever considered what is actually most important before God? It is that we boast in the Lord, not in anything we possess.

The psalmist says that you can rejoice in the Lord. For God will give you what your heart desires! Commit your life to Him, and He will act.

There is no need to pity yourself when you see your friends or relatives who already have a partner. Do not let being alone blur your view of how precious you are, making you insecure or bitter.

Life is a gift. Enjoy your existence. Let God's plan and timing unfold. There are things we cannot control. However, you can control your feelings, including loneliness. Therefore, come to God, who understands what your heart desires and will not remain silent. 

Cast all your anxieties on Him, because He cares for you. – 1 Peter 5:7  

Seek the Way, the Truth, and the Life

Jesus said to him: "I am the way and the truth and the life ...” – John 14:6a 

Life is not only about searching for a spouse and getting married. Fill your days with positive and beneficial activities, for example: 

• exercise, join a gym / yoga class,
• join a community,
• work on hobbies,
• be active in social activities,
• take part in ministry at church,
• take a course or learn something new,
• and many more.

Keep in mind, the activities above can help you forget life's burdens and struggles, but only temporarily. When you are alone or no longer busy, you may again feel lonely. 

Therefore, seek the way, the truth, and the life. In Jesus there is the way, there is the truth, and there is life. Come to Him. Search out His words and His will. Ask for help from people in a community that builds you up, namely those who live out the word of God in daily life. Surely, you will find those three things.

"Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and the door will be opened to you.” – Matthew 7:7 

May the four steps above help you drive away loneliness through the way, the truth, and the life that God desires!

-

Churches GKDI is in 35 cities in Indonesia. If you would like to join a personal Bible study (Personal Bible Sharing), a Bible Discussion, need counseling help, or want to attend Sunday worship or other church activities, please fill out the form below.

If you have questions or need other information, please contact us through the following WhatsApp 0821 2285 8686 .

Enjoy our worship song playlist at the following link: http://bit.ly/gkdi-music

And, find more interesting & inspiring content through our social media:

Website: https://gkdi.org
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/GKDIOfficial/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/gkdiofficial/
Blog: https://gkdi.org/blog/
YouTube: https://bit.ly/yt-gkdi
WhatsApp: https://bit.ly/gkdi-wa

Music Videos: